Week 19 The Whirl Pool By Dylan O’C

A few fishermen set out at noon to catch some fish.They got a radio call from an unknown person saying, “There is a ship with lots of treasure inside.”

They sent a map of where the treasure would be. They went to check it out and found nothing. Just then the wind got worse and the rain started pouring on us. A big whirlpool opened and the sailors fell in. They were in shock when they arrived.

“Where are we?” a fisherman asked?

We explored the inside and found so much treasure.

“WE ARE RICH!” we exclaimed.

Then we saw a big sign saying, The Lost City Of Atlantis.

How are we getting home?


5 thoughts on “Week 19 The Whirl Pool By Dylan O’C”

  1. Great writing Dylan. They ended up with a bit of a conundrum, lots of treasure but no way home! I wonder what you would do in that situation. Not an easy choice.
    Keep up the great work.
    Ms Brennock

  2. I enjoyed your story this week Dylan – Well done!
    I hope you find a way to get back. Otherwise all that treasure will be worthless.
    Good work this week.

  3. Hi Dylan. Outstanding story this week. It was very enjoyable reading it.
    *** Excellent paragraphing.
    Wish: There is no question mark after: a fishermen asked.
    ***Very creative.
    If you get a chance could you please look at my story and tell me what you think at: http://smppspower.weebly.com/100-wc-week-19/rebecca
    Keep up the BRILLIANT work!


  4. Maybe that’s the price of finding the treasure Dylan – that you are trapped with it forever! I love reading about the lost city of Atlantis. History and myths are always great inspiration for stories! Keep up the super writing Dylan!

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