Week 2 : Robber attack by Maciej

When Tom was going to the sweet shop he saw that there was a pot lying on the ground. When he went into the sweet shop he saw blood and sweets on the ground. The shopkeeper was gone. Suddenly the door shut.

Tom was trapped. He saw a robber with a knife but thankfully the guard came and arrested the robber. Tom went home.

On his way home he saw blood again. This time it was coming from his neighbour’s house….

6 thoughts on “Week 2 : Robber attack by Maciej”

  1. Mysterious ending.
    we would love to see what happens next.
    wish, you could use more adjectives
    what happend to the neighbour?

  2. This was a dramatic story. Your second paragraph was very powerful in that it began with that short sentence ‘Tom was trapped’. Ending with ellipses also created a sense of tension.

    Thank you for sharing your writing this week, I look forward to reading more of your work in future.

    Miss T
    Stockbridge school

  3. Thanks be to God that the guard came to arrest the robber,good job on your story and I hope you do more.

    From Fortune in Mr.Russell’s class

  4. Really scary Maciej I thought when there was blood from the neighbours house ?

    By Caoilan mrrussels 5th class

Comments are closed.