Week 2 Taking over the world By Jack

Hello, my name is Appollo star. I am an alien. I am from the planet Zukuruko in a far away Galaxy. My family and I were on holidays in the Milky Way when a missile from Earth hit our jet and we landed on the planet Mars. I survived but my family didn’t.

I was mad. I made a disease that I would spill onto the ground on Earth. I was going to kill everyone and it was all going perfectly until a kid knocked over the container. This was a catastrophe. It wasn’t poured on the right place on Earth -it was going to destroy the universe.

8 thoughts on “Week 2 Taking over the world By Jack”

  1. *I liked that your plans were foiled by a kid which made the story funny.
    *I like that you used a lot of words other people wouldn’t even think about like the word “nuclear”
    Wish: I think that you could use more ambitious words like furious instead of mad
    Do you find a way to save the universe?
    (-)This story reminds me of world war 1 and 2.
    Come visit Rehmat’s story http://smppspower.weebly.com/100-wc-week-21/rehmat#comments
    Come visit James’ story http://smppspower.weebly.com/100-wc-week-21/james#comments

  2. *I liked your story because it was different from other stories.
    *Very interrseting story of space.
    Wish:More of the same story.
    What inspered you?
    (remameds me of a movie I saw a mounth ago)

  3. Hi Jack

    This is a super story, I really enjoyed reading it. I can tell that you must read lots as your writing is well controlled, thoughtful and you have some great ideas. Is this really only your second 100wc? I look forward to reading more of your work over the coming months.

    Miss T
    Stockbridge school

  4. Hi Jack

    Great work I love the idea you have good adjectives and is Apollo star a god?

    I think you should put in some speech and take away some full stops and put commas.

    Isabella, Toby and Tyson

  5. I fell so sorry that your family did’nt make it,good job on your story.

    From Fortune in Mr.Russell’s class

  6. Hi Jack. Great story.I liked the part were the missile hit Appollo stars and his family jet.
    KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK!!!

    From tom

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