Week 6: I nearly died By Marc

” MR. Bath, can I go to the bathroom please?” I asked.

 Silently but quickly I went to the bathroom. Suddenly I saw an orange flame at the bathroom door. I sprinted back to the class and told Mr. Bath. As soon as my words were out the fire alarm went off.

” Everybody, stay calm!” shouted Mr. Bath.

We were going to go out the door but there were ginormous flames by the door. Clumsily I fell over and knocked my books off the table.

“Over here” shouted a deep voice. 

A firefighter had just come in the door and rescued us. I was very pleased. 

5 thoughts on “Week 6: I nearly died By Marc”

  1. Hi Marc
    This is a really excellent 100 word challenge. You used the word Bath very cleverly by assigning it to a character. You also created a lot of tension in your piece in how you used speech. You had me hooked from the start. I like how you used adjectives throughout your piece and I think it was particularly effective when you used ‘deep’ to describe the voice. Thank goodness it was a firefighter who had come to rescue you. Well done. Very creative writing!
    Ms O’Keeffe (team 100wc)

  2. Hi Marc,

    We really liked your story.
    Your story is amazing.
    We liked the way you used the prompt.

    From Jessica and Emily
    Ms Brenock’s class

  3. Hi my name is Charlie.
    I love how you interpreted bath as a name.
    Was anbody in your class injured?
    Was the fire intended or by accident?
    Bye.

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